How to Give Effective Feedback in the Workplace

Some years ago, when I waited tables for a living and before I worked at The Gottman Institute, I had a manager that I just couldn’t get along with. I constantly felt pressured like I wasn’t doing my job well, and I didn’t appreciate their tendency to disrespectfully bark out orders and level personal criticisms, or even insults, at me and my coworkers (which, unfortunately, are all common behaviors in restaurants). I knew I had to speak up because the situation was becoming tense and untenable and I needed to keep the job. So I spoke with my brother, who is a licensed therapist and the former head waiter of that restaurant, about how I could approach my manager and air my concerns and compl

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